


The Other Half of Me

by SapphyreLily



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Alternate Universe - Medical, Bromance, Half-Sibling Incest, M/M, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-16
Updated: 2015-04-21
Packaged: 2018-03-25 04:53:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 15,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3797467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SapphyreLily/pseuds/SapphyreLily
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[Originally submitted for AkaKuro Creation of Wonders (first 3 chapters) under the name Cerulean Kitsune.] <br/>Kuroko has an illness that may be terminal, and loses his memory after a heart attack. His doctor tries his best to cure him, but in the course of the treatment, he uncovers a series of shocking revelations...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally posted on ffnet too. Originally meant to be a oneshot, but it got too long so I made it into a multichap haha. It's still in progress though.  
> Disclaimer: I do not own Kuroko no Basuke.

“Kuroko! Oi, Kuroko! Come on, wake up! We’re going to be late for your dialysis appointment!”

The cerulean-haired man stirred, rolling over to blink blearily at his companion.

“Just a little longer… I’m so tired, Kagami-kun…” He tried to snuggle back into the blankets, but they were snatched out from under him. He let out a little whimper as the cold air hit his exposed skin. Warm arms scooped him up just a second later, and he burrowed happily into the embrace, luxuriating in the heat.

An exasperated sigh came from above his head, and he felt the faint jolting that meant Kagami was walking. “Honestly. The reason why you’re so tired is _because_ you didn’t go for dialysis. Are you trying to kill yourself?”

“Maybe… Then I wouldn’t be in so much pain all the time…”

Kagami huffed as he set Kuroko down on the edge of the bathtub and began undressing him. “Quit talking like that. We’re going to see that specialist today. Maybe he’ll finally find out what’s the cause of your problems.”

“Or maybe he’ll be a waste of money, just like all the others.” Kuroko looked up at Kagami with dispirited eyes. “I’m sorry for being a burden, Kagami-kun.”

Kagami’s eyes softened as he leant down to press his forehead to Kuroko’s. “Don’t ever say that. You’re my best friend - the one who stuck with me through the bad times, brought me back to my senses when I was being an asshole and, well, tolerated me. If paying for all your treatments is what I have to do to repay you, then I’ll gladly do it. Besides,” he pulled away to fill the bathtub. “I’ve got all this cash lying around. It’s better if I use it to help others rather than spend it on all the junk I used to do back then.”

Kuroko smiled weakly at his friend’s back. _Kagami-kun can be a sappy idiot sometimes._

The various tattoos peeking out from beneath the redhead’s shorts and T-shirt were a familiar sight by now, and Kuroko was glad he had managed to dissuade him from throwing his life away, once upon a time.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

They were sitting in the waiting room after Kuroko’s dialysis session. The cerulean-haired man looked healthier now, with more colour in his cheeks as he sipped on his weekly cup of vanilla milkshake. Ever since his kidneys began to fail him, he had to give up drinking them on a regular basis, or his life expectancy would drop even further.

_He shouldn’t even be drinking those things in the first place. They’re chock-full of sugar…_

Kagami tapped his foot impatiently. The doctor they were about to see was apparently the best in the region, but he couldn’t help feeling nervous. What if this doctor was a fraud, just like all the others? He was no doctor, but even he could tell that Kuroko was wasting away. The blunette looked thinner and thinner every day, and he complained about his joints aching every _other_ day. Nobody seemed to know what was wrong with him, and with how weak he was getting, he would be confined to a bed permanently if treatment wasn’t found soon.

A hand tugged on his elbow, bringing him out of his reverie. “Kagami-kun, it’s our turn.”

He looked up and saw that Kuroko was right. Their number was flashing on the screen. Kagami stood up first, then helped Kuroko to his feet, tossing his empty cup in a bin as they slowly walked to the consultation room. The gleaming nameplate read ‘Midorima Shintarou’, and while Kagami wasn’t expecting much, he certainly did not expect to see a room lined with trinkets of various shapes, sizes and colours.

He would have continued to stand in the doorway with his mouth agape if Kuroko didn’t jab him with a rather sharp elbow. Grumbling to himself, he shut the door and poked Kuroko lightly in the back of the head before taking his place against a wall. Then, he let his gaze travel aimlessly around the room, his posture and actions emanating boredom to the untrained eye. What he was actually doing was observing the doctor, who after a brief shock, was speaking quietly to Kuroko.

The doctor had a curious shade of green hair, and the fingers on his left hand were meticulously taped. The spectacles he wore gave him a professional look, but the man looked so serious that he wondered if he actually had a life outside of his work. _There’s professionalism, and there’s workaholism._

“-gami-kun. Kagami-kun.” Kuroko’s voice invaded his thoughts, and he realised the other wanted his opinion on something.

He stepped forward until he was behind the chair Kuroko was sitting in, then asked, “What is it?”

Kuroko shot him an ugly look. “Midorima-sensei was just telling me his diagnosis.”

_Oh, yeah, the diagnosis. That's fast._ “What does he have, Midorima-sensei?”

The green-haired man pushed his spectacles up with a taped finger before speaking. “As I was telling Kuroko-san before, I am unsure what his disease could be until we run some tests. However, based on his symptoms, my diagnosis would be lupus.”

“Lupus?” Kagami drew a blank. “What’s that?”

Midorima breathed out through his nose heavily, as if exasperated by his lack of knowledge. “Lupus, also known as Systemic Lupus Erythematosus, or SLE, is a disease where the body’s immune system attacks its own tissues. It is not as common in men as in women, which is why I doubted it at first. However, from the past reports from the other doctors that Kuroko-san has seen, I highly suspect that this is the cause.”

Kagami was very confused. He had never been the brightest student, and words still confused him although he was sure Midorima was doing his best to keep it simple. “So basically, Kuroko’s body is trying to kill itself?”

“That is correct. If you’d like, I can pass your case on to another doctor who is doing research in this area. I believe he said he has almost attained a cure.” Midorima shuffled his papers, and Kuroko looked up at Kagami.

“Do you want to try it, Kagami-kun? From what Midorima-sensei has said, I sincerely believe that I might have this _lupus_.”

“Kuroko, it’s up to you. I’m not gonna stop you if you want to tr- Wait.” He turned to Midorima. “Sensei, did you say that this other doctor has _almost_ got a cure?”

“That is correct.”

“So there’s no cure for lupus?” Kagami was horrified.

Kuroko, on the other hand, looked resigned, as if he had not expected much in the first place.

“As of yet, there is no cure. The most that we can do as doctors is to treat the symptoms, and suggest organ transplants if it is very serious.”

"Is it very difficult to find an organ donor?" Kagami asked, as the rusty gears in his brain began to creak and turn slowly. He knew that Kuroko was definitely ill enough to need an organ transplant, or at the very least, a kidney transplant.

"That generally depends on the person in need of a transplant. Blood transfusions are easy to come by, but matching organs is more difficult. The organs are larger, thus the body perceives them as more of a threat." Midorima explained.

"I... I see." Kagami tried his best to understand, but all he got was that there was a low chance of Kuroko getting a new organ if he so needed it.

A hand was tugging lightly at his elbow, and he turned to meet Kuroko's tired gaze.

"Kagami-kun. Would it be too much if a bother if I wanted to try?" The redhead heard his underlying question immediately.

_Would I be causing too much trouble for you if I wanted to get that cure?_

The bigger man shook his head, then spoke to Midorima. "Sensei, when's the earliest date we can meet with this other doctor?"

The greenhead looked thoughtful, and a little troubled. "He is a very busy man. I am not completely sure, but if you'd like-"

The door slammed open and a cheerful voice greeted, "Shin-chan! Akashi requests your presence in the lab, like right now!"

They all turned to see a male nurse with his fringe held back by an orange headband standing in the doorway. The nurse looked a little surprised to see them, but casually dropped them a wave as he walked over to pull Midorima from his chair.

"C'mon, you know Akashi doesn't like waiting. Sorry 'bout the interruption, fellas, but honestly, the higher-ups are a pain-"

"You can't just crash into an office and drag the doctor off like that! We're not done yet!" Kagami spluttered, causing the nurse to cock an eyebrow.

"Well, then, sir, maybe _you_ want to deal with our boss, if you think you're so great-"

"Takao." Midorima shrugged the nurse's hands off him with a reprimanding glare, then turned to face his patient. "Kuroko-san. If you'd like, we can go see the doctor right away. If I am correct, he is summoning me to demand I look for more test subjects for him."

Kuroko looked a little bewildered, and looked from Midorima to Takao to Kagami and back to Midorima again. Kagami nudged his friend, nodding to let him know it was okay if he wanted to go. Seemingly reassured, Kuroko shakily stood up and said, "Alright. I'm ready to see this doctor."

_Although it really is too sudden_.

Midorima nodded in acknowledgement, and Takao immediately shoved him out of the door, forcing the other two to chase after them. They dove down winding corridors, driving through crowds with nothing more than loud screams of "Excuse me!" and "Coming through!" The majority of the people they passed looked more surprised than anything, but some of them shot them dirty looks, cursing under their breath. Kagami was aware that Kuroko was growing weak due to their hectic pace, and after a few more turns, finally grabbed and hoisted the blunette into his arms.

Kuroko tried to protest, though he hardly had the energy to spare. "Kagami-kun, I can walk. Put me down-"

"No. I know your limits as well as you do, and your life is short enough as it is. Let me pamper you once in a while, alright?" He picked up the pace to follow the disappearing greenhead, leaving Kuroko to dwell on his words.

At long last, they reached a quiet stairwell with just one lift. Neither the nurse nor the doctor looked out of breath, which was surprising, considering their mad dash. Takao pulled out an identification card and waved it in front of the scanner. The lift doors opened, and Kagami was surprised to see that the interior was much more sophisticated than its dilapidated exterior. They had only just stepped inside when the lift shot off, arriving at their destination before Kagami even had a chance to regain his bearings.

He followed Midorima and Takao out of the lift dumbly and regretted it when he was hit by the cloying smell of disinfectant.

_Eww. This is even worse than what a normal hospital smells like. What do they keep in here, dead bodies?_

Even Kuroko seemed disturbed by the stench, and _he_ spent three days a week in the hospital for dialysis.

Kagami realised the blunette was trying to tell him something. "Sorry, what did you say?"

Kuroko huffed, then spoke again, his voice a whisper. "Midorima-sensei said this doctor was demanding test subjects. Do you think he means for clinical trials?"

Clinical trials. Those words seemed familiar. A gentle click in the back of his mind spurred forth the memory, and Kagami could only frown. "Maybe. I hope it's a later stage of the trial, at least. It might be safer."

He felt the blunette nod against his chest, and the movement was so weak that he couldn’t help but feel a surge of protectiveness for his friend.

"Kagami-san." Midorima's voice invaded his consciousness, and he stopped himself just in time to prevent from walking into Takao.

The nurse did not seemed pleased by his lack of awareness, and took an annoyed step away from him. They were standing in front of a door, with a nameplate that read 'Akashi Seijuurou: Head Researcher'. Midorima gave a curt knock, and a crisp voice called for them to enter barely a moment later.

Kagami followed the other two in before setting Kuroko on his feet. The cerulean-haired man still looked rather pale. Kagami wanted to ask if he was okay, but before he could, a slim hand entered his field of vision and held Kuroko firmly by the elbow. "Would you care to have a seat?"

_This must be Akashi-sensei_ , Kagami thought dumbly as he watched the doctor guide Kuroko to a chair. _He's... Short._

Akashi was also a redhead, although his hair was a brighter scarlet than Kagami’s dual-toned crimson. He really _was_ short, just a little bit taller than Kuroko. The biggest shock came when he sat down behind his desk and faced his visitors - a pair of heterochromatic eyes that gazed upon each of them, one blazing ruby and the other a dazzling gold. It was, needless to say, frightening. There was a strange air of authority about him, and his presence was both commanding and charismatic.

...and there was also one other thing. He noticed Kuroko the moment they stepped into the room, which was unusual. Kuroko's poor health had caused his innately low presence to diminish even further. Thus, to be able to see him right off the bat took a justifiable amount of skill that very _very_ few people possessed.

"Shintarou." The crisp voice shattered the silence, and Midorima flinched. "I requested for your presence, and yet you bring guests. Do you not understand the implications of bringing in others unannounced?"

Midorima bowed stiffly, and one hand shot up to keep Takao at bay. Kuroko noticed that the nurse looked as if he wanted to punch Akashi. "My apologies, Akashi. However, Kuroko-san was attending a consultation with me when you summoned, and I thought it would be prudent to bring him along. He may be able to help with your research."

"Oh, is that so?" Akashi levelled a look at the greenhead, his eyes narrowing. His face was mocking, as if Midorima was unworthy of making a decision such as that. "I will speak to both you and Kazunari later. Wait outside."

Midorima only bowed stiffly again and grabbed Takao by the collar, dragging him out of the room despite his enraged protests.

"That's not a very nice way to treat your subordinates."

Red and gold eyes met red and Kagami repressed the urge to shudder. "Who are you to oppose how I treat my colleagues?" Akashi's words were tipped with steel, and the temperature in the room seemed to drop by several degrees.

Kagami stared back, unafraid. "Kagami Taiga. Shouldn't a good work environment revolve around good relationships?"

"That depends on what sort of a work environment you run." Akashi stated bluntly. "I run research in this facility; anything short of exemplary work is intolerable, and makes for poor data collection. If poor results are the reason why my patients receive substandard treatment, then there is a need to rectify the matter immediately. Now," Akashi leaned back in his chair, glowering at Kagami. "If there are no further complaints on how I decide to run my research facilities, I believe that you and your companion have been brought here to seek treatment?"

Kuroko answered for both of them, surprising Akashi. It seemed as though he had forgotten Kuroko was there. "Yes, Akashi-sensei. Pardon my friend's brashness and rudeness. I was told by Midorima-sensei that you are developing a cure for lupus."

"That is correct. Am I correct to assume that you are the patient?"

"Yes, sensei. However, Midorima-sensei diagnosed me with lupus not ten minutes ago. I am not completely convinced that I have such a disease." Kuroko said seriously, and Akashi looked thoughtful.

Kagami tried not to roll his eyes. _Kuroko, you idiot, you just told me a while ago that you think you do have lupus!_

"Even if you do not have lupus, you are already sitting in my office. Thus, I will take charge of diagnosing your illness. Shall we begin?"

Kuroko nodded.

"How long have you been in pain? Describe the pain."

"Since more than two years ago..."

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

After Kagami and Kuroko had left, with a promise to contact them as soon as the test results returned, Akashi summoned Midorima and Takao back into his office. The redhead was comparing the notes he had taken during the consultation to the facts he had pulled up on his computer, and the furrow in his brow was only growing deeper.

"Shintarou, Kazunari. Take a seat."

"What do you think of this patient, Akashi?" Midorima was straight to the point.

Akashi shook his head and pulled off his reading glasses.

"Kuroko Tetsuya is an unusual case indeed. I suppose I must thank you for bringing him in. However," he said, red and gold eyes narrowing. "His condition has deteriorated so much that I fear even with our advanced medicine, we would not be able to cure him."

Midorima nodded along, as if he had reached that same conclusion. "It is as you say. Despite that, he would be a good subject to run some tests on. Perhaps one of the stronger drugs."

"If we do not double-blind this patient, we are compelled to scrap the double-blind for other subjects as well." Akashi raised an eyebrow at Midorima's suggestion.

Truly, it would not be a fair test if only Kuroko Tetsuya were to receive the drug and the other test subjects received the placebo. Yet it would be a waste and morally wrong if they did not attempt to treat him where they had the means to do so.

"You could always make his an isolated case." Takao spoke up.

Seeing the looks of the other two men, he shrugged. "You have enough patients to run the trial, one patient is not that much of a significant difference. Plus, it is unethical to refuse him treatment."

Akashi looked like he was mulling over the suggestion, and Midorima patted Takao on the shoulder. It was a fair argument, as they could always write Kuroko's case as a separate case study or scrap it altogether if the results were too far off the chart. On the other hand, to researchers like themselves, Kuroko would be an excellent guinea pig to test out some of the stronger medications they had been developing. If it failed… Well, everyone who willingly participated understood that there were risks involved.

Akashi picked up Kuroko's consultation notes. He seemed to have accepted Takao’s argument.

"Very well then. Kazunari, take these blood samples to Daiki. Test them for the usual, and have him email me the results. Shintarou, I'll leave you to find an appropriate dose to administer to our newest subject. If all goes well, we will have a new project to play with in two weeks."

Midorima and Takao looked at each other, the latter shrugging helplessly at Akashi's method of phrasing things. They wordlessly took their tasks and left the room, quietly grateful that Akashi had seemingly forgotten to punish them.

Meanwhile, Akashi took out a tiny gold ring that he wore on a chain around his neck, spinning it between his fingers. The tiny aquamarines embedded along its length glittered under the fluorescent lights, weaving a faint memory of cerulean hair and sky blue eyes.

_"Tetsu-nii-chan!" The small redheaded boy jumped onto the blunette's back, causing both of them to fall over._

_The cerulean-haired boy rolled onto his back, laughing. He lifted the smaller boy up so that his vibrant red hair was outlined by the blue sky._

_The smaller boy squealed and beat at his hands. "Put me down, Nii-chan! Put me down!"_

_"No can do, Sei-juu-rou,"  the blunette singsonged. "You attacked me first, so now I have to return the favour."_

_"No, no!" The redhead giggled._

_Larger hands put him down, and he tried to run away, but to no avail. The blunette's small fingers dug into his sides, and he screeched with laughter, the shimmering sound of bells echoing through the mansion's empty grounds._

Akashi dropped the ring back into the folds of his lab coat, passing a hand over his eyes as if to wipe away the memory. "Tetsu...ya... Could it...be?"

There was no one to reply him. The only sounds that reached his ears were the soft whir of the air-conditioning and the steady ticks of the analogue clock.


	2. Chapter 2

Kuroko curled up limply on the bed, looking every bit like a soggy noodle. Kagami sighed and poked his flatmate for the umpteenth time. "Ku. Ro. Ko. Get up, will ya?"

At his feet, Nigou whined, his tail thumping forlornly against the floorboards.

Kagami inched away from the dog while tugging at Kuroko's shirt. "Oi. The dog wants to be walked. Then we have to go see that creepy doctor."

"Akashi-sensei isn't creepy. It's all in your head, Kagami-kun. C'mere, Nigou." The puppy jumped up onto the bed with a bark of happiness, crawling up to and nuzzling his master.

Kagami swatted helplessly at the blanket near Nigou, growling at Kuroko. "Don't let him on the bed, geez! He'll be jumping on my bed too!"

"Nigou, go sleep on Kagami-kun's bed okay? It's a free-for-all."

A sharp yip came from the Alaskan malamute, and he scrambled to jump onto the adjoining bed.

"No! Come back here, mutt!" Kagami tried to catch the dog but missed, falling onto Kuroko's legs with a loud thump.

Nigou panted happily from his place on Kagami's bed, then walked over to his pillow and started gnawing at it. The redhead groaned in defeat, pounding on Kuroko's bed in frustration.

"You're too heavy, Kagami-kun," came a muffled voice, and he reluctantly rolled off Kuroko.

"You're just too weak. C'mon, the devil doctor awaits."

"How is he a demon? We've only met him once." Kuroko wiggled the sheets off himself, then staggered upright, heading for the bathroom.

"He's got red hair. And those dual-coloured eyes. You can't say the eyes aren't creepy." Kagami followed Kuroko, stopping and leaning against the bathroom doorframe.

"You have dual-coloured hair. And split eyebrows. Come up with better excuses, Kagami-kun." Kuroko mumbled around his toothbrush.

Kagami threw up his hands in frustration. "Fine. Be that way. Honestly, though, I don't like that guy. Can't tell you why."

"Why?"

"I don't know! I just don't! What do you find not freaky about him?"

Kuroko was silent, taking his time to rinse his mouth. "I don't know. He could see me. And he seems very familiar somehow."

"Like how you thought I was 'very familiar'?" Kagami's voice held a tone of disbelief. Kuroko stared at his reflection in the mirror in reply, and Kagami blanched a little. "You gotta be kidding me."

"But... That's exactly what it is." Kuroko insisted weakly.

Kagami sighed heavily, walking over to plop a hand on the blunette's head. Sadness spread through his heart as he ruffled the soft strands. "Do you have to do this with every redhead you meet? It's only going to hurt you."

"What if it's really him this time? Please, Kagami-kun. I have to try." Aquamarine orbs welled up with unshed tears, his yearning plainly evident.

Kagami's hand dug deeper into his hair, giving it a firm tug before letting go. "I get it, I get it. Just remember - I can't save you all the time, alright?"

Frail arms wrapped around his torso, and Kagami sighed in exasperation. "Thank you, Kagami-kun."

"You're the kid brother I never had. _Someone_ needs to take care of you." He pulled the hands off him, pushing Kuroko towards the wardrobe. "Now get. Reflect on your actions before you start chasing this one."

"Yes, mother."

Kuroko's hands ran softly over the shirts hanging in their walk-in wardrobe, unable to settle on a choice. His eyes wandered over the selection a few times, appraising each one before he gave up with an exasperated huff.

He turned instead to the multitude of drawers and pulled out a faded blue shirt and worn basketball shorts. As he tugged the garments out of the drawer, his hand brushed against a small black box. Kuroko gave it a lingering look, then pushed the drawer shut, promising himself to come back and take a look at it after their appointment. He dressed as quickly as possible, then left to find Kagami.

The redhead was sitting on the bed stroking Nigou hesitantly, and if he disapproved of Kuroko's attire, he didn't say anything. He held out the dog to the blunette, who clipped a leash on the collar. They left the house quietly, and the only sounds between them was that of Nigou’s panting.

“Kagami-kun.” Kuroko was the first to break the silence.

“Yeah?”

“I still haven’t read Otou-san’s journal.” Kagami spared the shorter man a look.

“Why not? Aren’t you curious?”

“…I am, but I’m more afraid of what I will find.” His voice was monotonous, but Kagami could hear a hint of strain in it.

“Kuroko. It’s been what, six years? Just read the book already. I’ll read it for you if you’re uncomfortable with it.”

“No, thank you. I need to face it myself. It’s just that… What if he says something that I can't accept?” There was a hint of frustration in his voice, and Kagami bumped his shoulder against the smaller man’s.

“You’re stronger than you think. Facing your own fear is more difficult than facing someone else’s, but I know you can do it. What happened to that crazy guy who punched me for doing drugs, huh?”

“He’s sick with a disease that could take his life.” Kuroko sighed. “I get what you’re trying to say. I’ll do it tonight.”

“That’s more like it.” Kagami ruffled Kuroko’s hair, and received a weak jab to his side. “Don’t forget, though. We still have to go meet that devil doctor.”

“He’s not… A… Devil…” A loud thump was heard as Kuroko collapsed. Nigou yelped as he fell, then approached and licked his master's face, whining.

"Kuroko! Oi! Hey, someone! Call an ambulance!”

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Kagami clung on to the receptionist's desk, breathing heavily. "Ma'am, my friend Kuroko Tetsuya came in with an ambulance about an hour ago. Can you direct me to the A and E?"

"Sorry sir. We only allow family members in to visit patients."

"He doesn't _have_ any family left, damnit!" Kagami pounded on the desk in anger.

The lady looked at him severely. "Sir, I will have to ask you to leave if you insist on this violent behaviour. We have other patients here."

"Seriously?" The receptionist levelled a glare at him. Her hand was moving under the table, probably towards the distress button that would call security.

"Alright, alright, I'll stop." Kagami drew a deep, shuddering breath, trying to force back his bubbling frustration. "Just... Can you tell me if he's out of the A and E?"

"I can check for you, but you will still not be allowed to visit him."

"That's fine, I just need to know he's okay."

"Please take a seat while I look it up for you." Kagami gritted his teeth but backed away from the desk, ignoring the dirty looks the other people in the room were giving him.

He sat down heavily in a chair, burying his face in his hands. He had never felt so helpless. Even when he almost died from drug overdose several years back, he didn't feel as low as this. Confined to waiting for news on his best friend, his mind began to wander, and he found himself back at the scene one hour before.

_"Someone call an ambulance!" Kagami shouted, dropping to his knees next to Kuroko. He flipped the blunette onto his back, removing the leash from his hand and tossing it to the side. "Nigou, stay."_

_The puppy whined, but laid down, resting his nose on his paws. Kagami tilted Kuroko's head back and put his ear above the other man's mouth, eyes towards his torso. There were very faint movements that marked the rise and fall of his chest, and the light puffs of air against his cheek convinced him that Kuroko was still breathing, for now._

_He pressed two fingers to Kuroko's neck, feeling for his pulse. He located it after a few failed tries, the slight pulsing weak and erratic. Huffing in relief, Kagami glanced about him, but no one was moving. They were all frozen in shock. He growled angrily, and Nigou whined again, padding forward to poke Kuroko's cheek with his nose._

_Kagami reached for his phone and dialled for the ambulance, speaking hurriedly as he kept watch over Kuroko. He shoved the phone back into his pocket after the call ended and proceeded to drag Kuroko's unconscious body to the side of the pavement. Remembering his training, he flipped Kuroko over into recovery position, constantly checking to ensure that he was still breathing._

_It took an eternity for the ambulance to arrive._

_The paramedics grilled him for details even as they lifted Kuroko onto the gurney, and he was about to follow them into the ambulance when he felt something nip his ankle. "Ow!"_

_At his feet, Nigou whined, his tail thumping uneasily against the floor._

_Kagami bent down and picked up the dog unwillingly. "Animals can't go in the ambulance, right?"_

_"Sorry sir." The paramedic shook his head. "We're headed to Rakuzan Hospital. You can come by after you drop your dog back home."_

_With that, the ambulance doors were slammed shut and it sped off, leaving Kagami and Nigou behind._

Kagami shuddered again, clenching his hands into tight fists. Why now? What could be wrong? Kuroko was going to start treatment today, and yet... He might die before he even had a chance to be cured.

"Kagami Taiga." A cold, familiar voice spoke. Kagami's head snapped up, his eyes meeting red and gold. "Akashi-sensei."

"Where is Tetsuya?"

_Tetsuya?_

A vein bulged on Kagami's forehead. _Who gave him the right to be so familiar with Kuroko?_

"He's in the A and E. They won't let me see him." Akashi's eyes widened, and when he next spoke, his voice was harsh. "Why? What happened?"

"I don't know." Kagami gritted out. "One moment we were walking the dog, then he collapsed. It was like he had a heart attack or something. They won't let me see him 'cos 'I'm not family', but Kuroko doesn't _have_ any family left!"

"I'll speak to them." Akashi said immediately.

He turned away and marched to the receptionist. Kagami couldn't hear their conversation, but he could see the receptionist's face. Her expression flickered the moment Akashi stepped up to her desk, and quickly became one of absolute fright, her tension not dissipating even as she turned away to type feverishly into her computer and make a few calls. If Kagami wasn't angry with her for being unhelpful earlier, he might have felt sorry for her. After all, he knew how terrifying Akashi was. And that was when he was in a relatively neutral mood.

Two minutes later, Akashi turned around and beckoned for Kagami to join him.

The two of them set off at a brisk pace, and Kagami dared to ask, "Where's Kuroko?"

"They're operating on him now. They said he did suffer a heart attack and they don't know the reason, so they're investigating. The fools," he hissed vehemently.

Kagami resisted the urge to take a few steps away from him.

"He is my patient, and they should have referred him to me immediately after he came in. Someone is going to pay for this."

"Where does that leave me?"

"You can wait outside the operating theatre. It might take a while. I will go in and supervise his operation myself." That did not sound particularly reassuring to Kagami, but given Akashi's standards, if he was going to interfere in Kuroko's operation, it might very well save his life.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Kuroko drifted in and out of consciousness, catching snippets of conversation. He couldn't distinguish between dreams and reality, and the words sounded too far away anyway. It was as if he were submerged underwater, and everything he saw, heard or felt was warped by the wall of water between him and them.

_"...heart attack..."_

_"...dangerous operation..."_

_"...sign the consent form..."_

_"It'll be alright, Tetsuya."_

_Funny_ , he thought. _Someone knows my name. How does this person know my name? I've been alone for so...long..._

He drifted into a brightly coloured scene, watching it from above, from a third person perspective. There were two men facing off in a small garden, the high walls preventing anyone from outside from looking in. Behind each man was a small boy of about six or seven years old, clinging tightly to their pants. They watched the men face off with a terrified look in their eyes, crinkling the men’s pants with their small hands.

The man with the taller boy behind him spoke first, breaking the icy silence. "Tetsuya-kun, take Seijuurou-kun and go into the house. Let Otou-san and Masaomi-oji-san settle this by themselves, okay?"

"What are you afraid of, Ryouhei?" The other man drawled. "Let the boys hear it. They will understand one day."

"It's not their fight, so leave them out of it! Spare the children a thought, will you?!"

"The world is harsh and cruel, as you well know, _dear friend_." Masaomi's eyes grew hard, and his voice bitter. "Better that they face reality head-on, than fill their minds with useless drabble. That's what _she_ would have wanted."

Ryouhei growled, meeting Masaomi's eyes with his own anger-filled ones. "Don't you _dare_ bring her into this. Let her memory rest in peace, why don't you?"

"Because I can't." Masaomi said simply. "We've put this off long enough, and I'm sure you've noticed by now."

"What are you talking about?" Ryouhei clenched his fists tightly, and Kuroko could see him holding himself back.

“Aww, don't tell me you still don't know? After all the evidence you've found? She left you, Ryou." Masaomi's voice was smug, but there was a hint of frustration in it too. "Left you for _me_. Weren't you the one that said, 'Seijuurou looks so much like her'? Isn't that evidence enough?"

"You said he was from a surrogate, and I believed you." Ryouhei's voice came out as a harsh whisper, his head hung and shoulders tense.

"So I did, but you should have known better." Masaomi's voice dropped to a low baritone, deep and menacing. "After all, her death was just _too_ convenient, don't you think?"

"Shut up!" Ryouhei roared, lunging forward to grab the other man by his lapels.

Neither he nor Kuroko noticed the little boy fall, whimpering as he crawled away. Ryouhei stared straight into Masaomi's eyes, as if trying to convey his hurt and hate for the other man through his glare alone. Masaomi smirked as if he sensed Ryouhei's hesitation.

"Still not man enough to throw a punch, huh, Ryou? See, that's why she picked me in the end, isn't it?"

"Shut your trap," Ryouhei growled, shortening the distance between their faces. "I don't know what you did to con Shiori into copulating with you, but she would never have picked you. Not intentionally."

Masaomi looked like he wanted to retort, but soft sniffling and muffled cries caught both men's attention. They turned simultaneously towards the source of the sound, and found Seijuurou burying his face in Tetsuya's shirt, hiccupping as he tried to suppress his tears. The bigger boy was also crying, tears slipping down his cheeks silently as the two of them cowered under the force of their fathers' terrifying auras.

The men rushed to wrench the boys apart, forgetting about their fight. As they were carried off in opposite directions, both began crying out in earnest, kicking and thrashing in their fathers' grips, but the men did not let go.

"Seijuurou! Otou-san, lemme go, lemme go!"

"Nii-chan! Tou-san, I want Nii-chan! NII-CHAN!"

"Tetsu-nii!!" The heartrending scream of the redhead tore Kuroko away from the scene.

He desperately tried to grab on to the fading wisps of the dream, but the colours faded out and he was cast back into the black abyss of dreamless sleep.

A soft, steady beeping permeated the haze of sleep when he next awoke, and Kuroko pried his eyelids apart to look for the source. He was greeted with a white ceiling, and as he cast his gaze around blearily, he saw more white items. His senses began to return slowly, and a few things registered in his mind.

One, he was lying down on a rather soft bed in a very empty room. There was a curtain half drawn around his bed, and as he craned his neck to look about him, he found the source of the beeping. There was a heart rate monitor to his left, and the dancing green line held a steady pattern, letting out a beep each time.

Two, his right hand felt very uncomfortable and itchy. As he ran his left hand over the offending spot, he felt something smooth, cylindrical and plastic. Looking down, he saw a tube attached to his hand, and that tube was attached to a thin hose, which was attached to a clear bag suspended next to his bed. _An IV drip?_

Third, there was the scent of antiseptic in the air, the sort of smell that only came about in sterile environments.

_Why… Why am I in a hospital? I’m not sick._

Kuroko was very confused.

_There’s something wrong about this picture. I want to leave, but I can’t pull out this IV line, I might hurt myself… Wait, hospitals usually have a ‘Help’ button.  Where is it?_

He tried to prop himself up to look for the button, but found that his arms were unusually weak. The moment he tried to put some weight on either appendage, they would buckle. After a few more tries that gave the same result, he gave up and slumped back on the pillows.

_Why am I so weak? What happened to me?_

Kuroko tried to recall something, anything, from the last time he was conscious, but kept running into a mental block. Anything that he managed to think of slipped away as quickly as it came to mind. He could vaguely recollect a myriad of colours and sounds, but due to their poor quality and his inability to retain them for more than a few heartbeats, he wrote them off as dreams.

There were a few promising leads, but when he tried to reel them in, they promptly unravelled in his hands. He managed to grab ahold of some small fragments that seemed to be memories, but as soon as he tried to follow the trail, they would fade away into nothing. The feeling of leaving something incomplete was overwhelming, especially after each memory he tried to pursue ended up in a dead end. A few minutes of this fruitless chasing put an extraordinary strain on him, and he soon gave up, gritting his teeth in vexation. He was sweating, small beads of sweat forming due to his mental exertion. He clenched his hands around the blanket, crushing the material.

_I can’t remember anything. Damn it, why?_

The soft sound of the opening door caught his attention, and he looked up to see a familiar-looking man with dual-coloured red hair enter. The moment the man saw he was awake, he ran over and enveloped him in a tight hug, crushing him.

Kuroko stiffened under his touch and gasped, “Can’t breathe…”

The man released him sheepishly. “Sorry, Kuroko. How long have you been awake? Should I call the nurse?”

“I just woke up.” _Who is he, again?_

“I better get the doctor then. He’ll be pleased to know that you’re awake.” The man reached over to press something on the wall, and Kuroko caught his arm weakly before he could do so.

As he did that, a name flashed in his mind, and he almost slumped with relief. _Finally, I remember something._

“You.. You’re Kagami-san, right?”

Kagami looked shocked. “Yes. What’s with the formal honorific?”

Kuroko’s eyebrows scrunched together. “Forgive me if I’m wrong, but we only have one class together, and we’re not very well acquainted. Why would I use a less formal honorific?”

Now, Kagami looked even more horrified. "One class-? Kuroko, what year is it?”

“What’s with the weird question out of the blue, Kagami-san? And why am I in a hospital?”

_I don’t understand._

“Just answer the question first! The doctor is better qualified to answer the other question anyway.”

“Kagami-san knows some big words.”

“I’m not a complete idiot, you know! I passed university!”

“Aren’t we still in our second year of university?”

Kagami looked like he wanted to throttle Kuroko, which was a much more familiar sight to him. Strangely, it relieved some of his building anxiety.

“No. Now. Tell. Me. What. Year. It. Is.”

“It is 2015.” Kuroko said unwaveringly.

Kagami blanched.

“You’ve got to be kidding me… I’m calling the doctor, right now.” He reached over and pushed the button, and while Kuroko wasn’t very pleased with him for doing that, he was more concerned about what Kagami said.

“It _is_ 2015, isn’t it? Kagami-san.”

Kagami passed a hand over his face, and Kuroko could see that he was shaking. “No. No, it isn’t. Here, take a look.”

Kagami pulled out his phone and unlocked it before handing it to Kuroko. His eyes widened when he saw the date on the screen. “Did you rig this, Kagami-san? It has to be a joke. And why am I your lock screen picture?”

“Forget the picture, that’s the least of your worries! It’s frigging _2022_ , Kuroko. You lost _seven years_ of your memory.”

“That’s not possible. I can remember…” Kuroko trailed off, clutching the phone tightly as he strained to summon evidence to prove his point.

Faint wisps of half-complete thoughts floated by, staying just out of reach as he made desperate grabs for them. The pounding headache and irritation came back, and still nothing came back to him.

Kagami looked at him in concern. “You can’t remember?”

“No! I will remember. I have to.” The last part of his words came out choked, and Kagami reached a hand out to pat his back awkwardly.

“Look, I can’t say I know what you’re going through, but the doctor should be here soon. He’ll explain things.”

The door clicked open then, and they both looked up to see a green-haired doctor walk in, a raven-haired nurse behind him.

“Good afternoon, Kuroko-san, Kagami-san.”

“Midorima-sensei. Perfect timing.” Kagami spoke, and his voice was strained. “Kuroko can’t remember.”

The greenhead immediately looked sharper, his posture straightening, while the nurse gaped at them. “I see. Alright, then. Please take a seat, Kagami-san. Kuroko-san, I’d like to give you a check-up first, then I will answer any questions that you have. Is that acceptable?”

Kuroko nodded mutely and handed the phone back to Kagami, the nurse stepping forward to elevate the bed. Kuroko vaguely registered that his nametag read ‘Takao Kazunari’, and then his upper body was being propped up by the man. Meanwhile, Midorima put on his stethoscope and approached him. “Kuroko-san, I’d like you to breathe as normally as possible while I check your lungs.”

“Alright.”

After the lung examination, Midorima shone a light into Kuroko’s eyes, took his temperature, and then referred to the machines beeping next to his bed. He scribbled some notes on a clipboard which was hanging at the foot of Kuroko’s bed.

“Everything seems to be in working order. Do you think you can stand, Kuroko-san? We need to go to the dialysis room, and I will answer your questions on the way.”

“Why do we need to go to the dialysis room?” Kuroko was puzzled.

“That’s because you need to go for dialysis. Can you walk?”

Kuroko flexed one leg experimentally, but there was almost no movement from the appendage. It was as if his legs were encased in cement, so stiff and immobile were they.

“I don’t think so. My legs feel weak.” He turned back to the doctor, allowing his confusion to spill onto his face. “Midorima-sensei, please, tell me. Why do I need dialysis?”

Kuroko sounded almost like he was begging, and Midorima glanced at Kagami. “Kagami-san, do you want to tell him?”

“You sure you want me to do it, sensei? I’m not the best person for breaking out bad news, y’know.” Kagami quirked an eyebrow.

Midorima sighed. “How much has he forgotten?”

“Seven years.”

Midorima’s eyes grew wide. “I see. Takao, get a wheelchair. Kuroko-san, forgive me if what I am about to say is harsh. I have never been good at sugar-coating my words.”

“Please, just tell me, sensei.”

_I have a bad feeling about this._

Midorima took a deep breath, as if bracing himself. “You cannot remember what has happened in the last seven years, according to Kagami-san. Therefore, you believe that it is the year 2015, am I correct?”

“Yes.”

“I see. This may be confusing for you, so please bear with me. In the year 2017, your kidneys began to fail for an unknown reason. Therefore, for the past five years, you have been coming to a hospital regularly to undergo dialysis, as your kidneys were unable to perform their job.” Takao returned just then, and Midorima paused as the wheelchair was unfolded and the bed rails lowered.

“Kuroko-san, please allow us to assist you.” Saying so, the nurse and doctor lifted Kuroko onto the chair quickly. The IV line was transferred to a pole on the wheelchair, and the wires to the heart rate monitor were disconnected.

The party of four stepped out into the hallway and into the winding corridors. There were very few people about, and the sounds of their footsteps told Kuroko that Kagami did not follow them. Midorima looked at him cautiously, and sensing his gaze, Kuroko began to speak hesitantly.

“Midorima-sensei, let’s say I accept what you are saying as the truth. Can you please tell me why I am here in the hospital? I am certain that dialysis does not require one to stay in hospital, nor be hooked up to an IV line or a heart rate monitor.”

The greenhead was silent for a moment. "Ever since your kidneys started failing, you have developed a number of unexplained medical conditions that numerous doctors could not cure. Last month, Kagami-san and yourself came to visit me, and we had originally arranged for you to be part of a clinical trial to test a prototype drug. Unfortunately, on the day that you were supposed to come in for the trial, you suffered a heart attack and had to undergo an operation."

"A heart...attack?" Kuroko was stunned.

Yes, he could not remember anything, and what Midorima was saying made absolutely no sense to him, but a heart attack?

_This feels like something out of a bad novel._

"A heart attack is the least of your problems, Kuroko-san. I did not mention earlier, but the condition that you have been diagnosed with is lupus, a disease where your body's immune system attacks its own cells. It is a rare condition in men, and even more so in your case as it only manifested later in life. Lupus is usually first diagnosed in a person's teenage years.” Midorima took a second to adjust his glasses.

"In your case, possibly because of the unusual factors involved, you are not as fortunate as other patients I have encountered. The amount of strain your body has undergone in the past few years - due to the lack of proper treatment - has caused your body to deteriorate at a faster pace. It is possible that the damage has extended to your brain. It would explain your memory loss."

"Could my memory loss be caused by the heart attack? I read that brain damage could be caused by the lack of oxygen." Kuroko knew he was grasping at straws, but he was struggling to accept this new reality.

Midorima shook his head. "Kagami-san assured me that you were breathing the entire time he was waiting for the ambulance. He is CPR trained, so I trust his word. He seems like a good person, despite first appearances." He added, almost as an afterthought.

Kuroko cocked his head slightly in surprise. "I do not remember Kagami-san that way. As far as I remember, he is that person who constantly falls asleep in class and does drugs on campus."

"Is that so." Midorima sounded disinterested, and a lively voice from above Kuroko's head took over the conversation. "Don't let Shin-chan get to you, he's always so gloomy, but he really does think that Kagami's a good guy. The dude was gonna trash the hospital for not helping you fast enough. The past week has been hell for him, I hear."

"Past week?" Kuroko gripped the handles of the wheelchair. "How long have I been out?"

"Oh, 'bout three to five days? Including the operation and all. You were in pretty bad shape; I was watching the op."

"Takao, cease your incessant chatter. You should not alarm Kuroko-san, it is bad for his heart."

"No, please, continue. I want to know, Midorima-sensei. How bad was it?"

"Terrible.” The doctor did not mince his words, but Kuroko thought he could have been a _little_ more tactful. “We do not know the reason behind your heart attack, but we suspect atherosclerosis. After we performed the surgery, we ran some extra tests, and I will have the results sent to you later for your reference. It's not that bad," he said with forced nonchalance. "The biggest cause of worry are your kidneys. If possible, we should try to find you a donor."

Kuroko lapsed into silence, even after they reached the room and hooked him up to the machine.

_He says it's not so bad, but it sounds rather serious. Five years on dialysis? That's about a fifth of my life! Atherosclerosis? I thought that only happened to really unhealthy people. Plus lupus? ...I must be dying._

Midorima was already leaving when Kuroko called out to him in a panicked tone. "Midorima-sensei, who is paying for all these treatments? I cannot afford it."

Midorima turned to look at him, an imperceptible look on his face. "Not to worry. Kagami-san is paying. He has appointed himself as your caretaker. All your past treatments were paid for by him as well."

Kuroko sat there mutely, even after Midorima had left. Kagami? Helping him? The idea was almost laughable. _Where did the money come from? Why would he help me?_

A soft tap on his free arm made him look up into Takao's grey eyes, and the nurse spoke firmly. "It’s not my place to say anything, but I think it’s good for you to know before you jump to conclusions. You may not remember, but I overheard Kagami mumbling as he sat by your bedside. Apparently, you saved him from overdosing on drugs. I don't pretend to know anything, but from the devotion that guy shows you, you might want to give him a second chance. Also, your dog misses you."

Takao turned to fiddle with some equipment, and Kuroko sank back into the sea of his thoughts.

_I have a dog. Perhaps I will remember something when I see it._

_...Kagami-san overdosing on drugs seems like a likely scenario._

"Takao-san, do you think I will get my memory back?"

"Maybe, maybe not. You can ask Kagami to bring you something from home that might jolt your memory. Yeah, don't look so surprised. You live with the dude. No, stop looking so horrified, I'm pretty sure it's platonic."

Kuroko just felt the stirrings of something akin to amusement, despite his initial reservation. "How do you read people so easily, Takao-san?"

"Practice. When you work with Shin-chan, you get pretty good at reading subtle emotions." Takao reached for the door, then turned back hesitantly. "Can I leave you here for a bit? I need to go get another patient."

"Ah, yes, sure. Go ahead."

The door clicked shut behind Takao, and Kuroko was left alone to process all the information thrown at him.


	3. Chapter 3

By the time Takao brought Kuroko back to his room, Kagami had already left. There was a note on the table, and its messy scrawl read:

_Kuroko,_

_I went home to get some stuff. I left your phone here, so text me if you want me to bring something._

_Kagami_

_P.S. I think the doctor said I could bring the mutt, but only if we stay in the garden. Are you up for it? I can bring Nigou tonight._

“See? He might not be such a bad guy after all.”

Kuroko turned the paper over, glaring lightly at Takao. “Takao-san, I believe it is bad manners to read other people’s private notes.”

The nurse shrugged as he transferred Kuroko back to the bed. “You hear many things working in hospitals. Honestly, all the medical staff want is for the patients to get better. And all some patients want is for their loved ones to visit them, so if we can help them mend that relationship, then we’ve done our jobs.”

Takao headed for the door after making sure Kuroko was settled and hooked up to the machines properly. “Message Kagami soon, alright? I think seeing your dog might help too. Animals help patients heal faster.”

“Thank you, Takao-san.”

The door shut with a soft click, and Kuroko reluctantly picked up the mobile phone. He spent a few minutes playing with it, figuring out its controls, before he opened up ‘Messaging’ and began composing a text.

**To: Kagami-kun**

**Message:**

**Kagami-san, please bring something that you think might help to jump-start my memory. I would like to see Nigou, if it is not too much trouble. Thank you.**

He immediately received a reply, the phone vibrating subtly in his hand.

**From: Kagami-kun**

**Message:**

**Okay. Tell a doctor or nurse that I’ll come with the dog at 7pm. Get Takao to bring you to the garden.**

**To: Kagami-kun**

**Message:**

**Noted.**

He sent the reply, then leaned back against the pillows, rubbing at his temples. He leaned back against the pillows, suddenly exhausted.

_How did things turn out this way? Things have escalated so quickly, and now I'm in the middle of a mess I don't remember. Memory loss is one thing, but until I see the medical records, I cannot bring myself to believe any of this. How could my health have deteriorated so quickly? What was the cause? I’m certain I did nothing that could have compromised my health._

A gentle knock came at the door, and a man with scarlet hair poked his head in. “Tetsuya, may I come in?”

“Uhm, yes. May I ask who you are?” Kuroko stared at the man curiously. He was the first person he had met the entire day that seemed vaguely polite – he had knocked first before entering, even though it was not required. _Although his casual use of my first name is a little disturbing._

“Ah, my apologies. Shintarou had mentioned this, but it slipped my mind.” The man cleared his throat and held out a hand for Kuroko to shake. “I am Akashi Seijuurou, head of the research team that is seeking a cure for lupus. These are your medical files, I believe you would like to take a look at them.”

“Thank you, Akashi-sensei.” Kuroko’s tone softened as he took the proffered files. “If I may ask for your professional opinion, how likely is it that I will recover my memories?”

“I cannot say, because it is an area that has not been well-researched on.”

Kuroko sighed deeply, his pent-up irritation rising to the surface. “Akashi-sensei, can I request something of you?”

“Anything, Tetsuya.”

“Talk to me in simple terms, and don’t hide anything that is of importance. People have been treating me like an idiot since I said I can’t remember anything, and I’m tired of it.”

Akashi looked at him carefully. “Why would you ask this of me, and not someone else?”

Kuroko shrugged. “You remind me of someone I think I knew – but as it is, I cannot remember. You look like someone who is unafraid to speak the brutal truth. Someone who can be trusted to make right decisions, even if they cost dearly.”

Akashi’s face was carefully composed into a neutral mask. “That is a curiously naïve way to think. However, I too, believe in trusting one’s instincts, thus I will grant your request.” Akashi began heading towards the door.

“We shall talk more in future. You look tired, and I will not impinge on your rest any further. Read through the files at your own pace, and we can discuss them another time.”

Kuroko hurriedly called out just as he was stepping out.

“Akashi-sensei, hold on, please. Kagami-san said he’ll be coming with Nigou this evening at 7pm, at the garden.”

The redhead’s back stiffened slightly. When he next spoke, his tone was cool. “Very well. I will inform the front desk and have Kazunari bring you there. Call for me if you need anything else.” The door shut resolutely behind him, and Kuroko felt uneasy at the way they had parted, though there was nothing very unusual about it.

7pm came rather quickly, and Kuroko had just finished reading the last medical record when Takao burst in with a wheelchair, grinning enthusiastically. “Kuroko-san, let’s go.” He was transferred into the chair at record speed, and without a moment’s hesitation, they shot off into the corridor.

The nurse seemed to enjoy travelling at high speeds, bending around tight corners  and skidding to stops when there were other patients about. Their travelling speed was so ridiculous, it was as if they were running from the devil himself. By the time they reached the courtyard, Kuroko was feeling rather nauseous. He didn’t realise that he was clinging on to the handles tightly until Takao tapped his white knuckles.

“Whoops. Sorry, Kuroko-san. I forgot to travel more slowly. Empty corridors just scream for me to run through them, y’know?” The raven-haired man grinned widely, and Kuroko could barely manage a weak grimace in return. _His enthusiasm is nice, he can be really over the top._

A loud bark caught their attention, and they turned to see a flustered Kagami being pulled along by an Alaskan malamute on a leash. “Geez, quit it, you mangy mongrel! Yo, Kuroko, Takao."

Kagami bent down and hooked a finger into Nigou's collar, effectively restraining the puppy. He glanced up as he removed the leash, saying, "I’ll call when he’s ready to go back later, so no worries, Takao.”

“Mm, but not too late, yeah? Shin-chan would throw a fit if he knew.” Takao waved as he walked off, whistling.

Kagami turned back to Kuroko, who was staring at the dog with wide eyes. “D’you wanna carry him? His name’s Tetsuya Nigou, or just Nigou. A friend of ours said he had your eyes, and the name kinda stuck.”

“Yes, please, Kagami-san.” Kuroko held out his arms for the puppy, and Kagami cautiously lifted the dog into his lap.

The moment he was set down, Nigou set to licking every inch of Kuroko’s skin he could reach, barking happily. The blunette laughed. He stroked Nigou’s fur and stared into the dog’s eyes, smiling softly.

Kagami cleared his throat and said gruffly, “Well, I guess the mutt was a good idea after all.”

“What are you talking about, Kagami-san? Of course it was a good idea.” He buried his face in Nigou’s fur, sighing in happiness. “Dogs are adorable.”

“No, they're all devils. Let’s go into the garden. There’s got to be a place somewhere I can sit down. Oh, and quit it with the ‘-san’ will ya? It’s irritating.”

“Calling you Kagami-kun would be weird, and what do you have against dogs?”

“A dog bit me when I was a kid. This one here is just a pest, and thank God I manage to handle him. If not, we would both be dead in the house without you around.”

“Ah, yes. Speaking of that, why do we live in the same house, Kagami-san? Now would be a good time to fill in the gaps in my memory. I trust that you will not feed me lies.”

"I'm not the druggie you remember me as, Kuroko. Have a little more faith." Kagami locked the wheelchair's wheels, then sat down heavily on a bench, tilting his head to gaze at the darkening sky.

After a few moments, he began speaking in a controlled voice. "In our final year of university, you found me in the communal showers, almost dead from heroin overdose. After sending me to hospital and vouching for me, you slapped reality in my face and forced me into rehab." Kagami looked over and Kuroko and gave him a wry grin. "Who would've thought small fry like you could beat up someone like me?"

"That's not being fair, Kagami-san. I'm sure you were weak enough that it was a possibility."

Kagami snorted. "You would've done it anyway. Believe me, you can be pretty terrifying.

"We started living together after uni because I owed you my life, and also because you were poor. There was another reason, but I don’t think I’m the right person to tell you. Because, well," Kagami stuttered, tripping over his words.

Seeing Kuroko's baffled look, he sighed and pulled out a small black box, handing it to Kuroko. "Here's your item to jump-start your memory. Works better as an explanation."

Kuroko accepted the box warily. He turned the box over in his hands curiously, opening it to reveal a small journal. He peeled the cover back, and the name on the first page jumped out at him. Kuroko dropped the box, and Nigou yelped in protest as it hit him. The cerulean-haired man didn't seem to notice, and kept staring at the diary, his fingers shaking.

"Kuroko-"

"My father's dead, isn't he?" Kuroko interrupted, his voice low. Kagami spoke slowly.

"Yes, and this is the journal you were supposed to read when he left."

"How- How did he die?" Kuroko's voice was quiet as he picked up the box, and replaced its cover gingerly.

The words 'Kuroko Ryouhei' etched into the first page of the book were burned into his memory, but he didn't feel like facing the music just yet.

"Car accident. His wheels skidded on ice and the car went off the bridge. Are you okay?" Kagami asked.

Kuroko shook his head minutely, clutching the box. The memory felt so fresh, the emotions and pain it contained so _real_. "I... Remember a little. It feels like I'm reliving the moment where the police told me he had died. The feeling of regret for not having spent more time together, for not being a better son." _There are other emotions too, but those are too dark for present company._

Kagami chose his words as carefully as he could. "You can still be a good son now by living your life well, and by reading that book. It was in his will that you were to have it."

"I'd like to go back to my room, please." Kuroko spoke after an eternity of silence, his voice so soft that Kagami nearly missed it.

The redhead said nothing, only reached for a button on the wheelchair to call for the nurse. They sat in silence for a few minutes, and just as they saw someone approaching them, Kagami spoke.

"Keep the book. You should read it if you can. You've put it off for five years, and while it's hard for you to read it now, I think you should know what your dad wanted to say to you. Should I come by tomorrow?"

Kuroko glanced up tiredly, and saw that the nurse was within earshot. "No, thank you. I'd like to rest first, and from what Takao-san has mentioned, I think you need to rest too. Thank you for doing this... Kagami-kun."

_I still don't fully believe you, but I know you aren't lying to me. You’re not obligated to do this, to help me, but thank you anyway._

Kagami's eyes widened a little as he said that, and he gave Kuroko a one-armed hug while ruffling his hair. "Take care, Kuroko. Come on, Nigou. Let your master rest, we can come back again." The puppy barked and turned around to lick Kuroko's face before hopping off.

"Let's get you back to your room, Tetsuya." Akashi's calm tone interrupted, and both Kuroko and Kagami’s eyes snapped up to stare at him.

"Akashi-sensei. Why are you here?"

"I don't particularly trust anyone, not after you turned up in the A and E, Tetsuya. Taiga, it's good to see you, but we must be going. Goodnight." Akashi expertly maneuvered the wheelchair away without giving Kagami a chance to reply.

Kuroko twisted round in his chair and waved to Kagami. The bigger man returned the gesture warily, then pointed at Akashi and shook his head. Kuroko cocked his head to one side. Kagami shook his head, waving one last time before walking away.

 _That’s strange. Kagami-san- no, Kagami-kun, doesn’t seem to like Akashi-sensei._ He was too far away to be sure, but he thought he had seen apprehension in Kagami’s eyes when he looked at Akashi.

After Kagami was out of sight, Kuroko craned his neck to look at Akashi. "Thank you for the concern, sensei, but I don't think it's necessary for you to come fetch me yourself. I don't want to be a burden."

"You could never be a burden, Tetsuya. I have my reasons for wanting to do this, one of which is a guilty conscience."

"You didn't kill someone, did you, Akashi-sensei?" Kuroko said cautiously.

Akashi laughed, a light, melodious sound. "No, nothing like that. You remind me of someone I knew once. He, too, was very kind, always looking out for others and ensuring their well-being. I never had the chance to return the favour, so allow me to pamper you as if you were he."

"That's very nice of you, Akashi-sensei, but surely you have other patients who are in greater need than I am." _He seems rather nice, based on second impressions. Why would Kagami-kun warn me about him?_

"Tetsuya." Akashi's tone turned serious. "It is my choice to prioritise your health right now, not simply because of sentimentality. You have read through your medical papers, yes?"

"Yes."

"Then you know where we stand. You, who are on the brink of death, cannot be given any less than the highest of priorities on my list. I am a doctor first, a researcher second, and a sentimental human being third. As a doctor, I believe that saving one life can make a huge difference, especially if that life can carry on to save many others. You will not change my mind otherwise on this matter."

Kuroko was silent, and when he next spoke, it was almost in resignation. "Very well, Akashi-sensei, but I really don't think it makes much of a difference."

"One domino falling can cause a chain reaction. You don't know your own power yet, Tetsuya, but you will go on to impact millions of lives." They reached Kuroko's room, and Akashi swiftly reattached all the loose wires and tubes.

"Goodnight, Tetsuya."

"Goodnight, Akashi-sensei."

"Please, just Akashi is fine. Earlier, you asked that I not withhold vital information. This is all I request of you in exchange."

"How about Akashi-kun? I cannot completely omit the honorifics, it is too rude." Kuroko offered.

"That is acceptable. I will see you tomorrow, Tetsuya. Rest well."

"Goodnight, Akashi-kun. Thank you."

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

“Yo, Akashi.” The navy-haired man leaned against the door, the very picture of boredom. The redhead did not even look up from his work. “What is it, Daiki?”

“I have some _interesting_ results.” He tossed the file on top of Akashi’s desk, then spun a chair around before collapsing into it.

Akashi glared at him, but picked up the file, skimming through its contents.

“I was running the mutation test for Kuroko, so I had to pull up his parental records. Thought his mum’s name looked rather familiar, so I ran a background check. Guess what I found?” Aomine’s tone was almost smug.

He batted away the paper ball that came flying at him, too used to it to be bothered by the action. Normally, Akashi would have used something more dangerous, but he had a reputation to maintain in the hospital.

Aomine leaned forward in anticipation, the words itching to leave his mouth. Akashi still did not look up.

“Hurry up, Daiki, I do not have all day.”

Aomine huffed, slumping despondently in the chair. “You’re no fun. I should go bother Kuroko instead, maybe _he_ would like to know. I doubt he knows.”

“Thirty seconds.”

“Alright, alright! I ran the DNA test, and his mother’s name came up as Kuroko Shiori.”

“Fifteen seconds.”

“You really don’t get it, do you? Your mum’s name was Shiori too.”

“There are many people in Japan by that name. Get to the point.” Akashi finally looked up, his red and gold eyes glowing.

Aomine shivered, and the words began spilling out of his mouth. “The test shows it’s the same person. I even ran it a second time to be sure. Kuroko Shiori and Akashi Shiori are the same person.

“Kuroko Tetsuya is your half-brother.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I give up editing this. Hope it's not too bad...
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Kuroko no Basuke.

Kuroko flipped through the medical files idly, scanning through line after line of diagnoses. He understood most of the medical jargon, but the substantial list of symptoms present made him wonder how any of those doctors had missed such an important differential diagnosis. Every doctor diagnosed him with a different infectious agent, and understandably, none of their treatments were successful.

He sighed heavily, then tucked the papers away neatly and tossed the file onto the side table. _Maybe I should give up faith in humanity after all. How could I have endured that for five years?_

_Could they have diagnosed me wrongly on purpose?_

_...some people are so selfish._

Soft knocking was heard at the door, and Akashi walked in, stack of papers in hand. “Good morning, Tetsuya.”

“Good morning, Akashi-kun. Where is Midorima-sensei?”

“Oh, would you rather have Shintarou as your doctor instead?” Akashi teased. “I can go get him, he’s just down the hall-“

“Oh no, please don’t.” Kuroko said hurriedly. Akashi raised an eyebrow, and a faint blush spread over Kuroko’s cheeks. “He seems rather…aloof. And very stiff.”

Akashi chuckled as he set about checking the blunette’s vitals. “That is an accurate description. You have no objections to me taking over your treatments, then?”

“No, Akashi-kun. Thank you for making the switch.”

“It’s no issue at all, Tetsuya. After all, I did mention that I trust no one else after the little stint at the A and E. Honestly, youngsters nowadays have no respect for the hierarchy system.” He muttered darkly, and a small grin appeared on Kuroko’s face.

_He doesn’t seem very scary at all. Why is everyone so apprehensive about him being my doctor?_

“You say that as if you are very old. How old is Akashi-kun?”

“It’s not polite to enquire about someone else’s age, you know.” Akashi gave him a mock-hurt look.

“I thought that only applied to females. Come now, Akashi-kun. Someone as dashing as you shouldn’t be worried about his age.” Kuroko teased. Akashi’s eyes lit up, and he leaned towards Kuroko, smirking.

“Did you just say that I was handsome, Tetsuya?”

“If that is what you wish to interpret it as, Akashi-kun. Your age?” Kuroko prodded gently, unfazed by their close proximity. Akashi drew back with a sigh, slumping into a chair at his bedside.

“If you must know, I’m turning twenty-six this year. Now, don’t go spreading that around, or my image will be tarnished.”

“I would never,” Kuroko said solemnly. “Twenty-six is pretty young. You’re a very accomplished person, Akashi-kun.”

“Thank you, Tetsuya. Now I believe it is your turn to tell me your age.”

“That was not in our agreement.”

“No, but it is courtesy to repay the favour.”

“You have seen my medical files, you should know my age.”

“It is only polite to enquire. It would make me seem like a stalker if I were to remember all these facts about you, wouldn’t it?”

In truth, Akashi did already memorise all of Kuroko’s details – but the cerulean-haired man didn’t need to know that.

“I will be twenty-seven next January. If I live that long,” he whispered sadly. A cool hand caught his own, and he jerked in surprise, automatically looking up into Akashi’s heterochromatic eyes.

“I will do everything in my power to make sure you live to see your next birthday, Tetsuya.” Akashi promised, and Kuroko nodded slowly. He could feel the weight of the words, and knew how difficult it would be to keep such a promise, especially with his condition. But gazing into the red-and-gold depths of Akashi’s eyes, he somehow knew that that promise could be made a reality.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

The following weeks in the hospital were quiet - meaning that there were no emergencies, and Kuroko's health did not deteriorate any faster. He was transferred to a normal ward (private, at Akashi and Kagami's insistence) and even managed to start physiotherapy - his aching joints began to restrict his movements, and Akashi thought it would be the best long-term solution.

"Shintarou and I agreed that detaining you within the hospital would be the best way to keep an eye on your condition. While you are here, we should start you on a proper recovery plan." He said while comparing various sets of notes. He glanced up at Kuroko, red and gold eyes calculating. "Is that agreeable?"

Kuroko shrugged. "If you say so, Akashi-kun. You're the doctor, you know best."

"It's settled, then. I'll have someone come in tomorrow."

The physiotherapist was a tall, tan man named Aomine Daiki, and from their first meeting, he had been very friendly towards Kuroko. (That was, of course, after Kuroko had scared him half to death by not announcing his presence.) His foul mouth was somewhat an issue, but at least he kept it under wraps most of the time.

"Yo, Tetsu."

The nickname had stuck from the first moment Aomine met Kuroko, but the cerulean-haired man couldn't bring himself to rebuke him. Their relationship was very casual, like that of siblings, and Aomine wasn’t afraid of roughing him up a little for fun. It made Kuroko feel more grounded, especially since most other doctors and nurses treated him as if he was already on his deathbed.

"Good morning, Aomine-kun. What's today's exercise?"

"Some light stretching, then Akashi says we can go take a walk in the garden. I hear Bakagami brought Nigou."

Aomine adored Nigou, but often clashed with Kagami due to their similar personalities. It worried Kuroko a little, but he knew that they actually got along pretty well. Watching their crazy antics cheered him up for some reason, so he never stopped them, unless it was escalating into a fight - which, he conceded, occurred fairly often.

They ran through the exercises like clockwork, and as they headed towards the garden, Aomine asked, oh-so-casually, "Say, Tetsu. Who's your next-of-kin?"

Kuroko shot him a sharp look - which he missed - and an elbow to his side - which had him howling in pain. "Ow! Tetsu!"

"Are you dumb or tactless, Aomine-kun?" Kuroko deadpanned. "You know I have no family left."

Aomine rubbed his aching side. _Damn, the guy could pack a punch if he wanted to._

"Parents, I know. What about grandparents?"

"Never knew them."

"Uncles, aunties?"

"My parents were the only child in their families."

"...right. So then, theoretically, if you had a long lost-sibling, what would you do?"

"...my parents would not have had an affair."

"You don't know that. Humans are fickle creatur- Ow!"

"Do not speak ill of the dead, Aomine-kun." Kuroko said mildly, as if he did not just jab the man in the ribs for the second time in three minutes.

"Yeah, yeah, okay. Honestly though, what if?"

Kuroko was silent for a moment. "I don't know. I've never thought about such things. It seems like something out of a novel - completely irrational and unrealistic."

_Why would Aomine-kun, of all people, be thinking about something like this?_

Aomine sighed, then grabbed Kuroko and knuckled his head. "Live a little, bro. I know Akashi promised he'll find a cure, but you and I both know the stats aren't good."

"I know." Came the muffled, despondent answer. "But there's still a possibility, even in the smallest percentage."

"That's the spirit." Aomine switched back to his jovial, carefree attitude so quickly, Kuroko had to wonder if he was truly being serious before.

"Oh hey, Nigou! You've grown larger! _What_ has Bakagami been feeding you, you're growing so fast..."

Time flew as Kuroko alternated between playing with them and resting, but the conversation with Aomine was still stuck in his mind.

He didn't have many memories. His old ones refused to come back, except at inopportune timings, and they usually were not of great importance. Any thoughts that came to mind lately seemed so unreal that he could not tell if they were fabricated lies, dreams or memories. That meant that he couldn't trust himself, and he was certainly not inclined to believe the medical staff either. (After all, they were obligated to tell white lies. There was probably a clause in their medical contract about it.)

Yet, for some reason, Aomine's words struck a chord in his heart.

Again, there was that feeling of remembering something, but the full memory was still tantalisingly out of reach. All he had to go on with was red hair, a tinkling laugh, and maybe, just maybe, a sweet little voice shouting, "Nii-chan!"

Was it possible that he did have a lost sibling after all?

And was that the reason why he was drawn to people with red hair?

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Akashi and Kuroko sat in companionable silence, one reading a novel, the other, research papers. Ever since Akashi had promised to find a cure for Kuroko, he had been visiting the blunette more often. They did not talk much, and for the most part did their own work. Akashi claimed that it was easier to concentrate in Kuroko’s room – apparently, his office was constantly being invaded by irritating subordinates.

They didn’t speak much at first, but after a brief period of apprehension, they began confiding in and ranting to each other. Contrary to hearsay, Kuroko found Akashi easy to talk to. He was more like a familiar old friend than the malevolent god that the other staff painted him as.

Most conversations between them usually dissolved into heated debates on various topics. Despite what others said about their terrifying exchanges, Kuroko felt as if he were learning something new every time.

Other times, they discussed lighter metters. They spoke briefly of their families – Kuroko had been raised by his father, as his mother had died in childbirth. Akashi knew his mother for a little longer – she died when he was four years old. Both fathers spent most of their time working, but where Kuroko’s father was a loving man, Akashi’s father was strict, and demanded only the very best from his son.

“I admit I am a perfectionist, and I expect nothing less than exceptional results. According to Shintarou, it’s because of that that many people find me terrifying.”

“I don’t think Akashi-kun is terrifying. Maybe sometimes, but I find that Akashi-kun is in general, a very pleasant person.”

“Thank you, Tetsuya. I believe I heard Kazunari mention in passing that I am less scary now that you have become my patient. However, such implications may not be good for my reputation. Perhaps I should step up the intimidation act.” He added thoughtfully.

“Akashi-kun. Not all working relationships are defined by an intimidation factor. There has to be mutual respect between the two parties.”

“That is an interesting theory. Perhaps I should test it out sometime…”

With the increasing amount of conversations they shared, Akashi found himself _quite_ fascinated by the blunette. He was not afraid to contest the redhead’s views, and brought fair and logical arguments to the table. Unlike many others he knew, Kuroko had _substance_ , and he began to thoroughly enjoy himself in the blunette’s company.

Of course, he was well aware of the line between them, the line he could not cross. It wasn’t just a matter of ethics, there was also the fact that Kuroko was dying to be considered. Despite all that, he couldn’t stop himself from feeling the way he did – it had been _so long_ since he had felt this relaxed in anyone’s company. Anyway, Aomine was always encouraging him to ‘live a little’ and ‘let go sometimes’ – surely this slight indulgence counted?

He didn’t understand it completely, but Kuroko knew he was becoming increasingly enamoured with Akashi. He was very accomplished for someone of his age, and while Kuroko understood that his upbringing played a part in it, he couldn’t help but admire the easy and confident manner in which the redhead carried himself. He earnestly looked forward to every one of Akashi’s visits, and tried his best to hide his disappointment when the redhead couldn’t come.

Kagami didn’t laugh when Kuroko told him about his abject fascination with Akashi. He merely shrugged and said, “You used to have a thing for chasing redheads before you lost your memory. You never fully told me the reason for it, and I never asked.”

When told about Aomine’s lost sibling theory and the faint recollection of red hair that came with it, Kagami didn’t look that surprised. “It’s possible,” he had said. “It would explain a lot of things.”

Aomine, on the other hand, had howled with laughter when he caught Kuroko staring at Akashi one day. Before either could question him, he dragged Kuroko off for physiotherapy, still giggling madly.

“Oh God, Tetsu,” he gasped, when they were finally behind closed doors. “You better explain why you like that devil so much. You look like a smitten schoolgirl, I’m not even kidding.”

The navy-haired man listened with amusement to Kuroko’s spluttering, refusing all his protests and half-witted explanations, including the sibling theory. He rejected so many of Kuroko’s half-formed excuses that the cerulean-haired man gave up in favour of ignoring him. Unfortunately, that only caused Aomine to dissolve into another bout of laughter.

After he had calmed down sufficiently, he hooked an arm around Kuroko’s neck, his demeanour turning serious.

“Look, Tetsu. Me and you are realists. We know that your chances of surviving without treatment are low, and even with treatment, the chances aren't high. I say you go and snag the guy if you like him so much. What do you have to lose?”

_Everything. Nothing._

“Oh, and you should watch your expression more closely. You look like a freaking kicked puppy every time he sends a note saying he can’t come visit.”

_Aomine-kun is sort of right, I have nothing to lose. But do I want this?_

Kuroko had never thought about such things before, never considered his sexuality. Heck, when people he knew had been getting into relationships, he had been holed up in a library, reading. Although, he secretly admitted that he had not been joking when he had accidentally complimented Akashi’s looks. He noticed that the more time they spent together, the more time he took to admire the redhead under the guise of reading.

The scarlet locks which constantly fell in his eyes when he was working. His smooth skin, fair and unblemished. His long, deft fingers, which were constantly dotted with ink when he was writing. His face, beautifully sculpted, that had an unreadable expression most of the time. And his eyes – ruby and molten gold.

He had overheard the orderlies talking numerous times, and every one of them was terrified of being sentenced under Akashi’s heterochromatic glare. Yet Kuroko couldn’t bring himself to see as they did. To him, those eyes held nothing but promise and comfort…and something else, an emotion he had no name for.

“Tetsuya, you’re staring again.” Akashi’s voice jerked him out of his reverie, and he let his eyes move back to his book.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Akashi-kun.”

“You can’t fool me, Tetsuya. You’ve been at the same page for the past ten minutes.”

“The book’s in English, it’s more difficult to read.” Kuroko countered.

“Maybe so, but I’ve seen you read faster than this, even with books in foreign languages. You’re noticeably distracted.”

“I am not.”

“You can’t fool me, Tetsuya. You’re blushing.”

“Am not.” Mumbled Kuroko, though he could feel the slight heat in his cheeks.

Akashi stared at him fondly, then shrugged and returned to his work. After a few minutes, just as Kuroko was actually getting drawn into the story, he casually mentioned, “I think we may have found an kidney donor for you.”

“Mmhmm-“ Kuroko nodded distractedly. The full impact of the words hit him a second later, and he dropped the book to stare open-mouthed at Akashi. “Really?”

“Yes. In your condition, I thought it was best to have a living donor, as compared to someone recently deceased. As such, he was the only suitable match we could find on such short notice. If you are willing, we can schedule the surgery for later next week.”

“Yes!” Kuroko was ecstatic. “Yes, of course. Who is he? Can I thank him in person?”

Akashi shook his head, and Kuroko’s heart fell a little. “He wants to remain anonymous. You can write him a letter though, we’ll pass it on to him.”

“Alright. I understand. Thank you very much, Akashi-kun. Oh. I better tell Kagami-kun, it’s his money, after all.” Kuroko added, and scrambled for his phone, missing the ugly look that flitted over Akashi’s face.

“Tetsuya, what exactly is your relationship with Taiga?” Akashi couldn’t stop the words from escaping, and he hoped they didn’t sound as bitter as he thought they did.

“We are apparently friends from university. I saved him from drug overdose, and he took me in after my dad died. He’s been paying for my treatments as a form of compensation, or so he says. I still cannot remember that.” Kuroko looked up with an apologetic glance.

_Looks like he didn’t notice, then._ “What are your feelings for him?”

“He’s like an overprotective brother, just like Aomine-kun. I couldn’t see him any other way.” Kuroko replaced the phone on the table, then looked at Akashi curiously. “Why are you asking all of a sudden, Akashi-kun?”

“Oh, no reason.” Akashi said airily, turning back to his notes. “It is one of our responsibilities as medical staff to understand our patients’ relationships, so that we can communicate with their families and loved ones more effectively.”

“I see.” Akashi spared a glance at Kuroko; the blunette’s expression was as unreadable as ever, but Akashi thought he detected a hint of disappointment in his voice.

_Trust me, Tetsuya. I’m as disappointed as you are._

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Two soft knocks came at Akashi’s office door. When no one barged in, he called out wearily, “Enter.”

Midorima stepped inside, looking over Akashi’s haggard appearance with a sigh. “You should stop wearing yourself out.”

“There’s so much to be done, and nobody is cooperating.” Akashi muttered darkly as he scribbled more annotations on the already worn-out paper. “How go the preparations? Is everything I asked for ready?”

“Yes. Are you sure you want to do this, Akashi? There is still time for you to back out of it.”

“Yes, I’m sure. It is my duty to do this.”

“Why? Several months ago, the two of you were complete strangers. And now you are willing to forfeit this much, for someone you still barely know? It is a huge sacrifice, especially for a patient we did not make plans for in the beginning. What, exactly, are you thinking?” Midorima’s tone was admonishing but Akashi didn’t have the energy to glare at him.

“You know the results of the DNA test that Daiki ran. We even had it sent to another lab just to be sure. Their results were the same as ours. It shows that he is no longer _just_ another patient. I have an _obligation_ , Shintarou, as his last living relative, to shoulder this burden. ”

“Why, then, are you writing your will?” Midorima was unfazed.

“It is good to be prepared in all situations.”

“That’s not what I meant, Akashi, and you know it.” Midorima’s voice was growing increasingly desperate. “I know what you’re up to, and I’m asking you, as a friend, to _stop it_. You have a full life ahead of you, you should take it and live it well. Weren’t you the one that said, ‘the weak have to pave the way for the strong’?”

“That is not the issue here, Shintarou, and you know it!” Akashi slammed a hand onto the table, his eyes fiery. The tension in the room shot up, almost suffocating Midorima.

“You don’t know what I know. You never had to suffer the same kind of torture my father liked to call ‘education’. Tetsuya is not only the last link to my past, he is also the _only_ person who was kind to me back in the days before we were separated, after my- our mother, died. Is it so wrong to want to repay the favour?”

“You can remember that far back?” The greenhead was shocked.

“Vaguely. I remember feeling _happy_ , Shintarou. Tell me, when was the last time, before we met Tetsuya, that you have seen me express such an emotion?” Akashi demanded. Midorima lowered his eyes. “Never. You know that as well as I do. Let me do what I want – Tetsuya deserves a second chance at life, with everything that I can provide him with. There are people waiting for him to recover. There’s no one waiting for me.”

“That’s not true.” Midorima muttered, and Akashi squinted at him.

“Say that again.”

“I said, that’s not true.” Midorima growled, clenching his fists. He lifted his head to meet Akashi’s gaze, hard emerald clashing with blazing ruby and gold. “I admit that many of us are still afraid of you, but that does not mean we will not miss you. Your insight and guidance are invaluable. Our department would not be where it is today without you. If that’s not argument enough, think of Kuroko. Don’t dismiss _his_ feelings as nothing!”

“Tetsuya does not see me in that manner. He does not know about our shared blood either, and I forbid you from telling him until this is all over.” Akashi’s voice was heavy, and there was a tinge of regret in it.

“Yes, he does ‘see you in that manner’. I highly disapprove, but I must admit that he does.” Midorima snarled, and Akashi’s eyes widened a fraction before he schooled them back into neutrality.

“Oh? Pray tell. What have you seen that I haven’t?”

“His expressions.” The greenhead said sharply. “I didn’t believe it at first when Aomine told me. Takao had also mentioned it in passing, but I did not believe him either. It was not until that day I was sent with your note of apology that I saw it.

“Do you know how sad he looks whenever he receives an apology note from you? In Aomine’s words, he looks like a ‘freaking kicked puppy’, but it’s more than that. The light completely leaves his eyes, and when he thanks us for taking the time to deliver the apology, his voice is so dead I would have believed a cadaver came back to life in his stead. He doesn’t move or engage in any activities after he realises you're not visiting. He doesn't read, picks at his food, and once, he turned away an offer to see his dog.” Midorima was almost shouting, and seeing Akashi’s face express faint alarm, he took a few deep breaths to calm himself.

“How do you not notice that every time you enter his room, he smiles as if Christmas came early? Sometimes he manages to catch himself, but you can _feel_ it. From halfway down the hall, we can feel the happiness radiating off him. From just outside the room, we can hear the life return to his voice. Can you tell me now that you don’t know how much you mean to him?”

Akashi lowered his eyes, clicking a pen uneasily. It was true, he had no idea before Midorima brought it up. He thought Kuroko treated him differently, but he wasn’t sure, and didn’t want to push his luck.

After all, if Kuroko ever said one word against him, another doctor would take over his treatment, and they would probably never meet again. He couldn’t risk that.

Midorima saw Akashi’s hesitance, so he lowered his voice and softened his tone.

“Akashi. I know, and I remember what you have been through. But I want you to think about it before you rush into this decision. From an uninvolved person’s perspective, I can safely say that you are as good for Kuroko as he is for you. As a friend, I want you to find happiness, and I certainly do not want you to throw your life away.

“You are not an unintelligent man, Akashi. I trust that you will make the correct decision, both in this matter and in your dealings with Kuroko. Fate always has more than one path to follow, and I trust that you will find the path you were destined to walk.”

Midorima left, the click of the door behind him echoing in the empty space. Akashi fisted a hand in his hair, groaning in frustration as he slumped on the table. How had things become this complicated so quickly?

_What am I supposed to do now?_


End file.
